Former Adulteress and Once-Wounded Wife Answer Your Questions

Coming soon: All-New Videos Featuring Former Adulteress Rebecca Halton, and Once-Wounded Wife Shelley Hendrix

In a brand-new series of videos (coming soon), Team Redeemed Co-Captains Rebecca Halton and Shelley Hendrix talk candidly with each other, about the impact adultery had on each of their lives.  Real, and sometimes raw, they tackle topics and questions people ask them about the most.

In the meantime, watch the preview below, and click here to learn more and begin reading stories that give hope for “life after your worst day”! 

 


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Shelley Hendrix is a wife, mother, Bible teacher, speaker, author, and television talk show host –but more important than any role she fills, she is most grateful to be a child of God, learning to live out of who God says she is.

Shelley has been referred to as the “strongest female communicator on the topic of grace in our generation.” She also knows the pain of adultery.  Shelley is honored to now be married to Stephen Hendrix.

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Rebecca Halton is an author, speaker, encourager, and “redeemed adulteress”.  People are often surprised by the frankness and freedom with which she shares about her redemption.

Rebecca is eager to help others avoid adultery, or find the forgiveness and healing she has.

Shelley: How I Found Out There Was Another Woman — And Moved Forward

The moment I found out that my greatest fear had come upon me, I was sitting at a desk talking on the phone to a friend who had also been a co-worker of my first husband.

I called her to ask her if she knew what was going on with him. How had this man who had proposed to me—twice!—had children with me, and given me his name, chosen to leave me with no real reason other than, “I don’t think we belong together anymore”?

Although I was very suspicious that there was someone else, my heart and mind did not want to go there. We had seen numerous professional counselors, ministers, and friends and he continued to deny that there was anyone else in the picture or in his life. I wanted to believe him, but something kept nagging at me that there was more than what my eyes were seeing.

I asked God to reveal to me anything that was hidden but needed to be revealed. And within about 9 days, He did just that. As I called this friend and asked a bold question, “Do you know if he is having an affair?” I honestly imagined her replying with some level of shock as she would say, “No way, Shelley. He is going through something but he would NEVER do that to you or the girls.”

But she didn’t say that.
Instead, the other end of the line got really quiet as she said:
“I’m so sorry. Yes, he is.”

I literally had to concentrate on breathing in and out. I cannot even begin to describe the storm of emotions and thoughts going through me. Every nerve felt exposed. I wonder if I did not have two precious little lives counting on me what I might have done in that moment.

But God…

Moving on when he moved out was a moment-by-moment process of relying on God’s strength to get me through. What got me through this and into a much better season? To keep this brief, I’ll bullet point some major “columns” that held me together while my world fell apart:

Intentionality with God and His Word—although books on divorce, adultery, marriage are good supplements, they should never replace the nourishment we receive from God’s own word.

Authentic relationships with God’s People—there were well-meaning people who offered unsolicited advice that wounded me in places where I was already hurting. But there were also people who stood with me in the pain and loved me through it. One woman called simply to say over the sound of my tears, “Shelley, I felt the nudge of the Spirit to tell you that there will be a better day. It won’t always feel like this.” And she was so right. There have been MANY, many better days since.

While it is true that our greatest wounds come through relationships, it is also true that our greatest healing also comes through relationships. Knowing that I wasn’t alone helped me to move on with my life, into the unknown of it all, while entrusting my life and the lives of my girls to a faithful Creator.


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Shelley Hendrix is wife to her best friend, mother, Bible teacher, speaker, author, and television talk show host — but more important than any role she fills, she is most grateful to be a child of God, learning to live out of who God says she is.

Click here to learn more about Shelley, who is also the founder of Church 4 Chicks and the author ofWhy Can’t We Just Get Along?

When Shelley’s Biggest Fear Came True

When I walked down the aisle in my home church on October 10, 1992, at about half past five o’clock, I never imagined that less than seven years and two children later, the man waiting for me at the end of that aisle would no longer be my husband. Never.

That fall day in 1992 was picture perfect. Our friendship and marriage seemed like it had everything going for it. Although we were both young, the pastor who married us and walked through our premarital counseling with us stated, “You two are more prepared for marriage than many 30-somethings I know.” As a young bride-to-be I paid attention to important indicators, like how he treated his mother, and managed money. I even made sure I didn’t have unrealistic expectations for our life, once we walked back up that aisle together as man and wife.

By the end of 1998, though, I began to suspect that something was not right between us. Our marriage in general was one of high highs and low lows. I consoled myself time and again with the thought that “he might do THIS, but he would NEVER do THAT.” I felt guilty for allowing myself to even wonder if he was being unfaithful. The worst my mind could imagine was that perhaps an inappropriate friendship had formed. And if it had, I wanted to nip it in the bud before my biggest fear came true.

On January 1, 1999, my husband said words I will never forget: “We are both good people, but I don’t believe we are good together.” The next few months were a nightmare, as I agonized over this relationship and tried with all my might to salvage it—whatever it took. Although his relationship with another woman did not come into the light until mid-March that year, I knew something was going on. My then-husband moved in and out of our home 3 times in those 3 months, before finalizing his decision to leave permanently on April 1.

We have two daughters, who were at that time 4 and 2 years old. My 4-year-old took it the hardest, and said so many times that I lost count: “Mommy, tell me again why my daddy doesn’t love you and doesn’t want to live with me?” How does a mother look into the innocent eyes of her 4-year-old child and answer this question?

My life—as I knew it—was over.
I felt hopeless. I felt violated.

I felt damaged. I felt like dying.

At that point, I had NO idea how much good God had in store for my children, for me personally, and for our future together. I learned something powerful in that season in my life: God’s ability to be good to us is never contingent upon someone else or what they do. I had NO idea how much my God would redeem me, my story, my daughters, and our lives in the way He can redeem anyone who wants a second chance!


shelley headshotShelley Hendrix is wife to her best friend, mother, Bible teacher, speaker, author, and television talk show host — but more important than any role she fills, she is most grateful to be a child of God, learning to live out of who God says she is.

Click here to learn more about Shelley, who is also the founder of Church 4 Chicks and the author of Why Can’t We Just Get Along?

About Team Redeemed

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Team Redeemed was born out of Author, Encourager, and Redeemed Adulteress Rebecca Halton’s desire to “team up” with other people who have experienced God’s redemption, like she has.  But it wasn’t until Author, Speaker and Church 4 Chicks Founder Shelley Hendrix stepped forward with her testimony of forgiveness and redemption, that Team Redeemed really started to come to life.

Rebecca was the “other woman,” in an adulterous relationship with a married man.
Shelley was the wounded wife whose first husband left her for his “other woman”.

Now, these two allies and “co-captains” are uniting their unique experiences around the messages of hope in Christ, freedom through forgiveness, and redemption through God’s love. We’re currently focused on encouraging others to find hope and help after an affair — or wisdom to avoid one in the first place — but we hope to expand in the future, as God leads.

They also want to rally other people’s testimonies around the liberating power spoken of in Revelation 12:10-12, which says:

10 Then I heard a loud voice in heaven say:

“Now have come the salvation and the power
and the kingdom of our God,
and the authority of his Messiah.
For the accuser of our brothers and sisters,
who accuses them before our God day and night,
has been hurled down.
11 They triumphed over him
    by the blood of the Lamb
    and by the word of their testimony;
they did not love their lives so much
as to shrink from death.
12 Therefore rejoice, you heavens
and you who dwell in them!
But woe to the earth and the sea,
because the devil has gone down to you!
He is filled with fury,
because he knows that his time is short.”
(New International Version, emphasis added)

To learn more about Rebecca and Shelley, visit www.rebeccahalton.com and www.shelleyhendrix.com, respectively. If you would like to contact Team Redeemed, please do so by e-mailing contact@teamredeemed.org. For staffing reasons, we apologize that we may not be able to reply as quickly as we’d like.